Pets

Trixie’s Rule: Bite first. Ask questions later.

Trixie takes her role as office guardian very seriously. And though this rule is generally limited to food, Trixie’s definition of food is quite a bit looser than the average canine’s. Or vulture’s. There is, however, a very easy formula to escaping the wrath of her iron paw. 1) Don’t be a delivery man 2) Be a cucumber. Yes, Trixie loves cucumbers. We think it’s weird too.

Person: Lisa
Favorite trick: “Circus”
Biggest fear: Flies

Mosby’s Rule: Full speed is the best speed.

Mosby is part hotdog, part Ferrari (Furr-ari?). A classic only child, he loves costumes and often makes himself the table centerpiece at our morning meetings. Mosby was home-schooled, but if he had attended a public institution, he would’ve been Track Team captain and his superlative would have definitely been Most Spirited.

He also probably would’ve been suspended for making out under the bleachers, because pup can’t hold his licker.

Person: Lamar
Favorite trick: The Meerkat
Biggest fear: Monochromatic outfits

Nicole’s Rule: The more kisses you give, the more treats you get.

We’re 99% sure Nicole is really a human living out her life as a dog a la Hocus Pocus. She’s beautiful. Passionate about being beautiful. Always ready to smile. And laser focused on giving you kisses. She’s our in-house model, our beauty influencer, and deserves all the pets in the world. Just don’t not give her attention, lest she give you the most powerful side eye you’ve ever seen.

Person: Madison
Favorite trick: Looking Good
Biggest fear: Lack of Attention

Saban’s Rule: Make ‘em work for it. Unless it’s butt scratches. Then gimme those.

When it comes to Saban, you gotta trust the process. He will warm up to you. Eventually. Some days he’s in it. Some months, he’s on hiatus and when called, he’ll say, “I don’t know her.”

But he’s always here in spirit, because if you know Kellie, then you know Saban: Dramatic. Sighs a lot. Desperately needs attention, but doesn’t want to make prolonged eye contact. He loves snuggles as much as he loves alone time and his very fashionable bow tie. And being on the inner circle is an honored privilege. Not a right.

Person: Kellie
Favorite trick: Fake Sleeping
Biggest fear: Commitment